Mykel's
Post
MRR Column no 51
or
The
Harvey Touch
or
#meneither
"Physical
revulsion at sex with the wrong person was a learned and socially
instituted response. More than that, it was an effective social
management tool, since once internalized, it institutes the
psychology of monogamy as a self-enforced system.” --Laura Kipnis
It's
the mother of all beershits... a bowl-filling steaming pile of
brownitude.. no --black... blacker than a Japanese businessman’s
suit... blacker than an NFL player... blacker than your ex-wife's
heart. A bubbling bowl of churning feces... neither solid nor
liquid... with the gaseous aroma of a turned-on oven whose flame has
gone out.
The
power of anal expulsion lifts me to new heights. I'm only vaguely
aware of the splash against the back of my legs... I can deal with
that later. Right now, the relief lifts me up... up... my balding
head nearly touching the bathroom ceiling... on the way to nirvana.
Everything
is right with the world. I've turned inside out... emptied myself of
doubt, fear, evil, the horror of day-to-day life. Ennui replaced by
ecstasy. I walk on air from the toilet paper to the bedroom to the
street below... where I say hello and blow a kiss to the ugliest girl
I see.
“Fuck,
you!” she says... and then. “No, I take that back. I WON'T fuck
you. Not now or ever.”
My
beer-shit high leaves me, and I crash down to the filthy streets of
the city.
That's
just the start.
I
leave the subway at Grand Central Station. As usual, a nest of
tourists gathers at the exit... consulting their cellphone maps,..
turning this way and that to orient their Google to the simple
streets of Manhattan.
A
young white woman... judging from the width of her hips, probably not
a New Yorker... squints with confusion at the tiny screen in front of
her.
“Are
you lost?” I ask.
It's
as if I'd asked, “Can you show me your twat?”
Her
eyebrows raise in half anger and half terror.
“No!”
she shouts and walks off... no-- stomps off... in the wrong
direction, I hope.
What
happened?
FLASH
TO THE NEWS: Harvey Weinstein, a rather unappealing-looking man is
charged hither and yon with sexual harassment. Like a Bill Cosby
redux, any vaginated creature who was ever in the same room with the
guy... now claims she was harassed... violated... humiliated.
Even males who try to cast aside their penis privilege get their balls nailed to the table. Take Ben Affleck... please... Like most male feminists, Affleck clearly wants to get on the good side of women. It's called the urge to get laid. When the Weinstein affair is announced Affleck tweets:
Even males who try to cast aside their penis privilege get their balls nailed to the table. Take Ben Affleck... please... Like most male feminists, Affleck clearly wants to get on the good side of women. It's called the urge to get laid. When the Weinstein affair is announced Affleck tweets:
I
am saddened and angry that a man who I worked with used his position
to intimidate, sexually harass, and manipulate many women over
decades....
The
tweet goes on to say how wonderful women are and how they need to
have more power. blah, blah blah...
Does
it work? Does Affleck suddenly have a harem of women begging him to
taste their liberated juices? You bet your Anita Hill he doesn't.
Instead, more harassees come out of the woodwork... like termites
from a burning log. One of them accuses Affleck himself of “groping”
her. What did he do?
“He
touched my breast.”
I
shit you not. He
touched her breast!
I
live in New York... Do you know how many breasts I touch on any given
rush hour train? How many times my own manly nips are brushed?
Breast-touching is as common as crossing the street against a red
light... and just as offensive.
The
atmosphere is getting so that people are afraid to touch each other
at all. Every tap on the shoulder... every hug... every peck on the
cheek is sexual
harassment.
Sex itself... is sexual harassment.
As
I write this, Weinstein, a former
Hollywood mogul, is in trouble because he used the casting couch to
get laid. He's a big ugly bulldog of a man, but there are few reports
of force or brutality.
“Hey
kid, you wanna be in pictures? Put those fat lips around this flesh
cigar ticket to stardom?”
And
why not? Is pay-to-play for Hollywood any worse than pay-to-play for
the smuggling truck for that Mexican delivery boy? Is a
multi-thousand-dollar-movie-contract-to-fame worse than immigrants
sleeping 6 in a room for tips? Who do you think suffers more?
Why
is SEXUAL harassment worse than any other kind? Why is giving a
blowjob for a movie role worse than suffering hours in a truck...
maybe dying... to mow lawns? Why is giving a blowjob-- once-- for
Hollywood-- any worse than the toadying that office workers do every
day to KEEP their jobs.
Work
late with no pay? #metoo
Wake
up early to wear clothes you hate to work 8-10 hours at something
soul-destroying? #metoo
Grind
your teeth at night because the boss criticized some minor infraction
of a work rule? #metoo
Rather flip tricks than flip burgers. #metoo
What's
the difference between all this exploitation and the victims of
Harvey Weinstein? It's SEX! SEX! SEX! It comes back to
Christianity... to the idea that sex is a SIN! Though most modern
feminists are atheists... their morality is Protestant...
Evangelical. Of all the horrible things people do to get a keep a
job... of all the overwork, low/no pay, theft from the public,
deceiving... involved in the American workplace... only SEX is the
bad one.
Remember
when sex was fun? Spontaneous? As politics-free as a good beershit?
#metoo
FLASH
TO THE SUBWAY: It's the 23rd
Street stop. From my seat I see the doors open and an old woman...
leaning on a walker... heading toward the train. She shuffles,
pulling her right foot ahead and then bringing up the left... then
pushing her right foot ahead once more. On her face is a grimace...
the snarl of continual pain and frustration. Through that snarl, I
can see a single tooth on her lower jaw.
She
slowly approaches... The BONG BING of the closing door... I bolt...
just make it... pry the doors apart so the woman and her walker can
squeeze inside. She makes it... looks at me. I can read her thoughts.
They say, I KNOW WHY YOU DID THAT! YOU WANT TO FUCK ME!
That's
it. All social intercourse has become harassment! All contact between
genders is for sex. I never thought I'd agree with Betsy DeVos, the
woman who wants to destroy public education... but she said “If
everything is harassment, then nothing is.” She's right.
Kidding,
jokes, honest flirtation, courtship... all are dead in a world so
sex-obsessed that words are RAPE. Is spin-the-bottle sexual
harassment? Young men, just exploring their own sexuality... forced
to face verbal castration or be accused in the #metoo-ism of
harassment. Will heterosexual sex become as contractual as accepting
a job offer: in
writing-- or not at all.
(Side
note: maybe the benefit of this mentality will be an increase in
homosexuality.... Aaah... a small silver lining.)
In
2006, members of the Duke University lacrosse team were
accused
of gang-raping a student. The young men went through hell... were
shunned... isolated by their friends... shamed by the media... found
guilty in the press... held as examples of “rape culture” by
puritanical feminists... They were not guilty.
In
2015, Rolling
Stone magazine
reported another
gang rape.
This time at the University of Virginia. A horrific first-person
account of multiple forced penetration by multiple partners. It was a
lie.
In
2017 the main rape victim in America is THE TRUTH. Along with other
victims: humor, banter, and a sense of anything other than OUTRAGE.
Sex is like politics... there's only US and THE BAD GUYS.
Ever
rape anyone? #meneither
Do
you only talk to strangers with the intention of getting sex from
them? #meneither
Would
you prefer to operate a jackhammer for $10 an hour to giving a
handjob for a million dollar movie contract? …. #meneither
If
you have your choice between slinging fried eggs in a diner for the
rest of your life or letting some ugly guy screw you once for a dream
life... would you chose the diner? #meneither
If
you found a world where people are afraid to touch one another...
where every hug is harrassment...
where
every kiss is rape...
Would
you want to live in that world? #meneither
Do
you find yourself feeling guilty because you looked at someone
lustfully? Because you had sex when you were drunk? Because you
didn't get a written contract before touching genitals? #meneither
Do
you like living in a world where fame means every sexual peccadillo
of past mishaps gets waved in your face-- and pulled out of your
wallet? Where real and fake accusations... sometimes dozens of years
old... are pulled out in legal blackmail? #meneither
The
tweets have already started. It was too logical to pass up... there
are dozens. But they seem to lack focus. Would you object to adding
your own so we could have a real conversation? #meneither
-end-
==============
ENDNOTES:
[You can contact me on facebook
or by email at god@mykelboard.com.
Through the post office: send those... er... private DVDs..or music
or zines... or anything else (legal only!) to: Mykel Board, POB 137,
New York, NY 10012-0003. If you like my writing, you can be notified
when anything new is available. Subscribe to the MYKEL'S READERS
Yahoo group readmboard-subscribe@yahoogroups.com]
-->Public
admissions dept:
Actually, I love my job (teaching English to Japanese people), and
I'm rarely angry or annoyed with the boss. The #metoos
in the piece above are based on the lives I see around me... not on
my own. I don't have to wear a tie to work.
-->If
that's not racist Dept:
The Whitney Museum removed
a painting based on the dead civil rights activist Emmit Till. Why?
Because the artist was a white person. That makes it exploitation,
don't you see?
As
long as some races are allowed to speak (write, make art) and others
are forbidden... there can ONLY be racism. As long as EVERYTHING is
race... or sex... or gender... as long as basic principle of the
right to a point of view is
ignored... Society will be more racist, sexist, genderist... and less
free.
-->If
that's not censorship Dept: Students
“affiliated” with Black Lives Matter shut
down an ACLU
a “free speech” discussion at the College of William and Mary.
Why? Because the ACLU defends the right of all
people
to express their ideas. That includes Nazis, The Klan, and... Black
Lives Matters. The ACLU speaker offered platform time to BLM, but
they preferred to keep shouting so that the event had to stop.
Someday, I hope, that's going to come around and bite them in the
ass.
-->Nasal
Harassment Dept: Chuck
Shephard's great News
of the Weird reports:
Neven
Ciganovic of Croatia was undergoing the latest in a series of plastic
surgeries (this one a rhinoplasty) in Iran when he "reacted
badly" to the general anesthesia and developed a painful,
long-lasting erection, known as priapism. As he recovered in a
Serbian hospital, Ciganovic was denied painkillers and was only
relieved of the condition after another surgery, although he says it
will be months before he is fully recovered. The tattoo-covered
Ciganovic is hoping his latest nose operation will improve his looks
enough to launch him to international stardom.
I
say, looks? Who cares about looks? He could achieve stardom with his
priapism! Pictures please!
-->This
Just In Dept: Former President George HW Bush (the REALLY OLD
ONE) has said he
was sorry after actress Heather Lind accused him of sexually
assaulting her during a TV show promotion in 2014. They guy was 91
years old in 2014... in a wheelchair... What kind of sexual assault?
“He touched me... twice.” Okay Lind... what is it? Did my agent
pay you to prove my point?
-->
Keeping
the Pressure on Dept:
I want to thank reader George Metesky for suggesting a continuing
Bring Back Mykel effort directed at Maximum
Rock'n'Roll
for censoring me.
As
their revolving editrixes move on to commercial ventures, each blames
her predecessors for my demise... as if they had no control over the
business... and couldn't simply invite me back.
Send
your comments to
mrr@maximumrocknroll.com (or
post on their facebook
page)
with the subject line: BRING BACK MYKEL! Let me know how they answer.
See
you in hell.
-end-
I
have another blog of short interesting things at:
http://mykelsclippings.blogspot.com.
And finally, my oldies from last century are slowly being scanned and uploaded to: http://mykelsoldies.blogspot.com/
And finally, my oldies from last century are slowly being scanned and uploaded to: http://mykelsoldies.blogspot.com/
LINK
TRADE:
I
read that the search engines like lots of links... and it's also nice
to support my friends and enemies in their blogs. So facebook
me or email
me
if you have a blog, webpage or something else to connect to.
Here's
a start:
David
Goldberg's Busy
Microbes Blog
And
another Goldberg:
goldberg.wordpress.com
