POST
MRR COLUMN NO. 9
Mykel
is pro-choice: To Have Slaves or Not
by
Mykel Board
"The
freedom for which Davy Crockett, James Bowie and the rest fought at
the Alamo was the freedom to own slaves. As soon as Anglos set up the
Republic of Texas, its legislature ordered all free black people out
of the Republic.” --James W. Loewin
“One
of the things freedom requires is that we allow people to be boorish
and uncivilized. But that doesn’t mean we approve of it.”
– Rand Paul on the faults of the
1964 Civil Rights Act which outlawed racial discrimination at private
businesses.
It
happens all the time... an itchy nose... an errant hair grows from
inside and begins to tickle. Micron by invisible micron, it lengthens
and begins to press its way out, invisible in the mirror... but more
and more irritating.
I
run my index finger under my nostril. Ah, there it is! I squeeze the
hair between my thumbnail and finger. Pull! A hard fast downward
jerk. Damn.. slipped right through... still there... invading the
privacy of my nostril. Try again, this time squeezing hard, digging
my nail against my finger until it bleeds... almost. JERK HARD...
there's ping of pain inside my nose. I DID IT.
I
examine the hair. The whole thing, I got it. From gray tip to white
root. There it is. I drop it in the waste basket and celebrate my new
nasal freedom from irritants. Then I think... what about that single
nosehair?
Here's
the deal: Rand Paul and several other “Libertarians”
claim that the idea of freedom is the right to make your own
choices, free from government interference.
They
say the 1964 Civil Rights bill, passed under Lyndon Johnson, takes
away the freedom of restaurant and hotel owners to refuse to serve
whoever they damn well please to refuse to serve.
Sheldon
Richman, a Libertarian writer for the Christian Science Monitor sums
it up:
I
write as a Libertarian, something Rand Paul claims not to be. The
essence of the Libertarian philosophy is that each person owns him-
or herself and whatever belongings he or she honestly acquires. Thus
individuals are due freedom of association and, logically,
non-association. It also follows that the owner of property should be
free to set the rules of use, the only constraint being that the
owner may not use aggressive force against others.
Admittedly,
that leaves room for loathsome peaceful behavior, such as running a
whites-only lunch counter. Who imagined that freedom of association
couldn’t have its ugly side?
Nevertheless,
individuals are either free to do anything peaceful or they are not.
If politicians decide, we have arbitrary government. But government
is force, and force is moral only in response to force.
[Flash
to an alternate 1963] The segregated South gets whiff of the Civil
Rights plans. There's a meeting in the basement of the Baptist church
in Lubbock, Texas: a dozen men, each with his rifle. Tough-talking
Sheriff “Wild” Bill Jackson tells the assembled crew:
“I
know Johnson,” he says. “He used to be one of us. Now, he wants
to take away our rights... like Lincoln did... He needs the same
solution. You ready boys?”
“We're
ready Bill,” comes the reply.
“Let's
go,” says Bill.
It's
inauguration day. Lyndon is taking over from Kennedy. We're in
Washington DC for the swear-in... somewhere behind an alternate
grassy knoll..
PEKYUUU!
Johnson's dead as a Kennedy. President Humphrey has all the support
of Klansman in Harlem. There is no Civil Rights Act.
The
lunch counter sit-ins in Greensboro spread throughout the segregated
South. To Woolworth's, to diners, to catfish shacks from Myrtle Beach
to El Paso. Colored folks walk into restaurants and just sit, waiting
to be served. Often there is trouble.
“Now
you boys just go to your own places,” says a waitress. “People
like to be with their own kind.”
“But
we want to eat here,” says a coffee-colored young man. “This is a
public place, and we're the public.”
“If
you don't leave,” says the clerk, “I'm afraid I'm gonna have to
call the law.”
“Now,”
says the young man, “we're just sitting here-- not causing any
problem.”
Before
long, the cops come. “You're under arrest, boys!”
They
refuse to leave. There is violence.
Wake-up
buckaroos. Can't you get it? BOTH SIDES need to use the force of
government. The Civil Rights Act says that owners of public
accommodations must serve everyone. If they don't, then the
government uses force (fines, police protection etc) to ensure they
do.
By
Libertarian rules, if colored folks sit at a whites-only lunch
counter, and the owner has a “right” not to serve them, what does
he do? He can use force (private cops) to get them out, and if they
fight back POW! Call the city cops and have the government use force.
The
question is NOT intimidation by government force, but only which
side is intimidated. It's too easy to only think about the
nostril and forget the reality of the nosehair.
Libertarians
would allow slavery, because it should be a private CHOICE whether or
not to have slaves. Right? But what about the SLAVES' choice?
Libertarians oppose the minimum wage, because it should be the
employer's CHOICE how much to pay his employees. But what about the
EMPLOYEES' choice?
Oh
yeah, don't tell me they can just leave and find other jobs. With
high unemployment, there are NO other jobs. And double oh yeah,
Libertarians oppose unemployment benefits. Can you say SLAVERY?
More
recently, these Libertarians, along with a gaggle of religious
rightists are asking the government for the “right” for
corporations to refuse to serve-- or provide for-- people based on
their religious beliefs.
Take Mormonism... please!
Mormons used to believe colored people were less than human. Their
skin was cursed by God for some past sin I'm too lazy to Google.
Recently-- probably due to Mitt Romney's inability to crack the
double digits among black voters-- the Later Day Saints have
relented. For Mormons, Negro nosehairs are now just as good as white
nosehairs. It reminds me of the 1960s Catholics unblaming the Jews
for killing Christ. Gee thanks.
But imagine pre-Romney Mormons
owning a restaurant and that restaurant refusing to serve Negroes
because their “religion prohibits it!” Is that freedom? What
about the Negroes?
A couple months ago I wrote about
the Crown Heights riots in Brooklyn. After a colored kid was struck
by a car in a Lubavitch procession, a Lubavitch ambulance appeared...
and picked up the driver.
Since I wrote that, I found out
that the driver had been attacked by a mob and the pick-up was for
his protection. Good reason. But, couldn't they have picked up the
kid too? I dunno. Maybe there was a religious reason.
Let's go to 1990... an alternate
1990. A Libertarian world. Little Moishe Pippik is crossing Steinway
Street in the Middle East section of Queens. He steps into the
crosswalk. The motorcade of Imam Jooshmoo comes to the crosswalk at
the same time.
SPLATT! Looks like little Moishe
is not going to make it to his Bar Mitzvah.
WEEOOO WEEOOO BLAU BLAU BLAU
WEEOO WEEOO, a Sheik-Saver volunteer ambulance pulls up to the front
of the motorcade. The Imam gets in. Little Moishe goes to meet that
other Moishe in Jewish heaven. Of course, there is a riot.
Could you imagine a city
(country? world?) where an ambulance, say from Columbia Presbyterian
Hospital would only pick up Presbyterians? What about the guy lying
in the street? Should he just wait for the right ambulance? Do they
check his religious ID card? Doesn't sound like freedom at
all.
“Should
Muslim butchers have to serve pork?” shout the Libertarians.
“Of
course not,” I say, “but they have to serve Jews.”
If
they're public butchers, licensed to operate on the public streets of
the city, they have to serve everyone. There is no requirement that
butchers serve pork at all. No public pork license... no mandated
meat... only that it be uncontaminated..
It's
a little different with Hobby Lobby. That
company is owned by Evangelicals. Because of the owners' religious
beliefs, they refuse to provide their employees with some kinds of
contraception (as required by law). The law already exempts religious
institutions from having to provide these benefits, but HOBBY LOBBY
is not a religious group. It's a company open for business with a
government (state, Federal tax ID) license. There IS a law that says
employer insurance must pay for birth control for its employees.
Does Hobby Lobby have the
“religious freedom” to deny benefits to their employees? If
that's their freedom, what about the EMPLOYEES?
FLASH
TO ALTERNATE 2014: I've got a shopping list of things to do: a visit
to the doctor for a check-up, a visit to the drug store for stomach
medication... and condoms, to replace the ones in my wallet-- expired
1999. Then to the grocery store for coffee and shrimp for dinner.
“Hey,
doc,” I say, “it's time for a health check. Gotta see if I'm
gonna make it to another birthday.”
“Sorry
Mykel,” says Doc, “I've converted to Pentecostal. I don't examine
or work with anyone who drinks alcohol. My apologies and I hope
you'll see the error of your ways and give up drinking.”
Shit!
What am I going to do now? My insurance is limited. I can only get a
check-up from an “in-network” doctor. I'll have to find another
doc. Do they list their religions on the web? Maybe I'll just skip it
this year.
So,
I'm off to the pharmacy for my stomach medication. I have chronic
heartburn... GERD... and need to take a stupid brown pill every day
to stop the pain.
I
walk to the back of CVS and give a pretty young clerk my
prescription. She hands it back to me.
“I'm
sorry, Mr. Board,” she says. “I'm a Christian Scientist. We
believe that God alone heals us. Drugs and doctors are like voodoo...
black magic... prayer makes healing... not drugs.”
And
you can guess how far I get looking for condoms. I feel like a
discarded nosehair.
So
what about Hobby Lobby? The law says that employers of over 20 people
have to provide healthcare for those people. “Healthcare” is
defined to include birth control.
ASIDE:
I don't like Obamacare, but my reasons have nothing to do with
religious rights. I believe that it's the duty of the GOVERNMENT to
“provide for the general welfare” of its citizens. (Article 1
section 8 of the US Constitution) If health isn't
“general welfare” I don't know what is. Employers
shouldn't be burdened with this. It's the job-- the main job-- of
government. But Obamacare is the law: for everyone. END
OF ASIDE
Companies
do not have religion. Corporations do not get Bar Mitzvahed.
Starbucks will not have a first communion. Catholic bookstores, if
they're in a church, do not have to provide abortions for their
employees. But a company? A store? How can they be free to choose
among benefits in the name of religion? What about the EMPLOYEES'
choice?
I'd
write more, but my nose itches.
ENDNOTES:
[You
can contact me by email at god@mykelboard.com.
Through the post office: send those... er... private DVDs..or music
or zines... or anything else (legal only!) to: Mykel Board, POB 137,
New York, NY 10012-0003.]
-->Don't
plug my loophole baby dept: Loopholes4all.com
is a website that gives you a foreign address, a company, and an
offshore bank account where you can safely stash your dozens of
dollars without the feds knowing. The website says it's "a
service to democratize offshore business for people who don't want to
pay for their riches. It empowers everyone to evade taxes, hide money
and debt and get away with anything, by stealing the identities of
real offshore companies."
PayPal
has suspended all payments to Loopholes... An interesting
development, since PayPal avoids paying US taxes by situating itself
in Luxembourg. Is that offshore enough for you?
-->Maybe
it's the language dept: Montreal Mayor Michael Applebaum was the
first English-speaking mayor of the city in more than a century. He
was elected in 2013 with a campaign promise to "end an era of
sleaze" in the city government. He recently resigned after being
arrested for fraud. He is accused of accepting bribes for awarding
construction permits. In Toronto, the (of course English-speaking)
mayor has resisted calls to quit over a crack-smoking scandal. In
fact, he's running for re-election.
-->Sounds
like the CIA dept: Lots of Brazilians have been protesting the
2014 World Cup and 2016 Olympics. Like the Olympics, the World Cup is
high status, but really bad for the locals. The influx of tourists
causes huge price increases, and housing shortages. Often locals find
themselves in near lock-downs in the name of "security."
But these protests have the smell of something more. The Brazilian
President, Dilma Rousseff, was a leftist activist and she is loved by
many on the left. The vehemence of the protests says that there may
be something more than Olympiphobia behind them. Anyway, that's where
I'd place my bets.
-->Sometimes
conspiracies are true dept: Anytime someone accuses the
government of being bad, and not telling people it was bad, you hear
"It's some conspiracy nut." Trouble is... lots of
conspiracies are true.
ABC
News revealed
that, in the early 1960s, America's top military leaders drafted
plans to kill innocent people and commit acts of terrorism in U.S.
cities. Why? To create public support for a war against Cuba. Code
named Operation Northwoods, the plans reportedly included the
possible assassination of Cuban émigrés, sinking boats of Cuban
refugees on the high seas, hijacking planes, blowing up a U.S. ship,
and even orchestrating violent terrorism in U.S. cities.
Makes that
stuff about the
The World Trade Center seem... er... plausible, doesn't it?
-->Keeping
the pressure on dept: I want to thank reader George Metesky for
suggesting a Bring Back
Mykel
concerted effort directed at Maximum Rock'n'Roll. He
forwarded me an answer to a letter MRR printed where the editors
excuse my firing not as censorship for content, but because I
“refuse to answer letters in the letters section.”
That
is not true. I only asked that I be allowed to say I don't LIKE to
answer letters in the letters section. It's unfair to the
letter-writer for the columnist to always get the last word. If MRR
demands I answer there, I will. SO, here I'm publicly agreeing to
abide by their rules. Here it is in ones and zeros. Their excuse for
censoring me disappears.
I
hope you'll cut and paste the paragraph above into an email, and send
it-- along with your comments-- to mrr@maximumrocknroll.com
with the subject line: BRING BACK MYKEL. Let me know how they answer.
MRR also has a facebook
page, (as does (did?) Mariam
Bastani, the girl who fired me. In any case, you can't get to her page from here. It may be gone.) You might want to let them know
how you feel in any case.
-end-
If
you like my writing, you can be notified when anything new is
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READERS Yahoo group
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You're also welcome to use that group to have discussions, ask
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